And stay tuned for Sleep Week kicking off Mother’s Day, May 10 — six days of sleep-focused content, 10 new sleep meditations, a sleep-centered live session with Teacher of the Month Cara Lai, podcast episodes featuring some of the world’s leading sleep experts, and a community coming together around something we all need more of. Only in the 10% with Dan Harris app. Sign up here.

As someone who is both anxious and skeptical, I am always looking for non-bullshit ways to boost my calm quotient. Lately, I’ve become increasingly interested in something called “vagal tone.”

Depending on how you have (consciously or subconsciously) trained the algorithms, you might’ve seen a lot of influencer content about training your vagus nerve. Some of this stuff is dubious, but it turns out there’s actually a valuable nugget of truth, too.

Sign up for the 10% with Dan Harris app

The vagus nerve is a long wandering nerve that runs from the brain down through the heart, lungs, and gut, helping regulate key functions involved in stress and recovery. It’s a major player when it comes to shifting out of fight-or-flight mode and into a more settled state. And there’s growing evidence you may be able to strengthen this system—sometimes called improving vagal tone—through simple practices.

A lot of the modalities for improving vagal tone are obvious, and we’ve covered them before. Getting enough sleep, regularly moving your body, being outside in nature, these are all on the list. But there are a few slightly less obvious ones I want to highlight.

Social connection: Connection may be one of the oldest nervous system regulation tools we have. It makes sense when you consider we evolved for this kind of thing. (I also don’t think it’s a coincidence we’re seeing historic levels of anxiety and depression at a time when modern technology, hyper-individualism, and political polarization have driven us apart.)

After neglecting this part of my life for way too long, I have, in recent years, done a lot of work to boost my “social fitness.” There is evidence that warm, trusting connection—eye contact, affectionate touch, laughter, feeling understood, etc.—may support parasympathetic regulation. But you don’t have to do it because it might impact your physiology; do it because it’s fun. (If you feel like you don’t know anybody to hang out with, try volunteering for a cause you care about. It’s a great way to meet people.)

Social connection will be a major theme in my next book, which I am, finally, nearly finished writing. (Much more on this very soon.)

Hot and cold. Getting in a sauna for 15 minutes a few times a week may support relaxation and recovery pathways. There’s also a ton of hype around cold plunges. If, like me, you find sitting in a cold bath to be deeply unattractive, you can just briefly stand in a cold shower. After a recent interview with an expert on the vagus nerve, I’ve started finishing my daily showers with 15 seconds of cold. Apparently, it might be important to let the water hit your face. I’m trying to build up to 30 or 60 seconds, where the impact may be stronger. It definitely feels good when it’s over!

Deep breathing and meditation. This one is pretty obvious to readers of this newsletter, but bear with me… You’ve all heard me hammer on about meditation, I’ve been doing so for more than a decade. But there’s evidence to suggest it not only helps you disentangle from your thoughts, but also benefits your nervous system.

In recent years, I’ve been pairing meditation with deep breathing. I start my sessions with a minute or two of straw breathing, where you take a deep inhale through the nose and then a really long exhale through the mouth, with the lips pursed as if you’re blowing through a straw.

One important note: many of these practices may help regulate the nervous system in the moment; whether they literally increase “vagal tone” over time is a harder scientific question.

Share

If you want to learn more about how to improve your vagal tone, check out my new podcast episode with Kevin J. Tracey, a neurosurgeon and researcher, who is refreshingly skeptical of influencer claims. (FYI, Tracey’s major breakthrough was helping establish that this nerve acts like the “brakes” for your immune system, sending electrical signals that can turn off dangerous, chronic inflammation. Fascinating stuff.)

Also out is my episode with meditator and mystic Rosa Lewis on how to relax the need to control everything.

Over on the 10% with Dan Harris app:

Join Teacher of the Month Susa Talan tomorrow (Tuesday, April 28 at 4 p.m. ET) for a live meditation and Q&A on Zoom. Drop your questions for her in the event post on the app here.

Upcoming events in person:

As mentioned above, on May 17 come see me at 92NY: tickets here.

Tickets for the next Meditation Party are available here! Jeff Warren, Sebene Selassie, and I are doing another version of our annual retreat this Oct. 16-18. It’s at the Omega Institute in upstate NY. Think four big sessions of meditation, conversation, and Q&A—with plenty of free time to hike the 240-acre campus, play some pickleball, shoot hoops, or just relax by the lake. You can also drop into yoga or tai chi classes, and on Saturday night there’s even a dance party (totally optional, I promise).

Sign up for the 10% with Dan Harris app

Paid subscribers to the new 10% with Dan Harris app get:

• Guided Meditations: A library of guided sessions to help with stress, anxiety, focus, sleep, annoying people, and more.

• Meditation Challenges: Structured programs to deepen your practice with clear goals, daily guidance, and community support.

• Live Meditation and Q&A Sessions: Every week, meditate live with me and some of the best meditation teachers on earth. Ask questions. Get actual answers.

• The 10% Happier Podcast: Subscribers get access to ad-free versions of my pod. Both the new episodes and the entire archive, stretching back almost 10 years.

• Community Connection: Join conversations with thousands of other practitioners who get it. Share your struggles, celebrate wins, get support when you need it.

Join the party.

Subscribe to our Substack

Kevin J. Tracey, MD, is president and CEO of the Feinstein Institutes for Medical Research at Northwell Health, a pioneer of vagus nerve research and author of the recent book, The Great Nerve: The New Science of the VagusNerve and How to Harness Its Healing Reflexes.

Join Dan and Emmy Award-winning journalist Allison Gilbert at 92NY on May 17th for a live conversation about how mindfulness can deepen connection and combat loneliness, available in person and via streaming. Register here.

Join Dan, Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18, 2026. Register here.

They also answer subscriber questions on shame and how to work with it skillfully, the RAIN technique, breaking the cycle of rumination, and Sebene’s beloved elements practice as a tool for embodiment. Plus: an unexpectedly lively digression on colonoscopy prep and the nature of being with discomfort.

If you want to go deeper with Dan and Sebene, check out their Audible Original, Even You Can Meditate, available now.

Get the 10% with Dan Harris app here

Sign up for Dan’s free newsletter here

Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok

Subscribe to our YouTube Channel

Join Dan and Emmy Award-winning journalist Allison Gilbert at 92NY on May 17th for a live conversation about how mindfulness can deepen connection and combat loneliness, available in person and via streaming. Register here.

Join Dan, Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18, 2026. Register here.

Join Dan and Emmy Award-winning journalist Allison Gilbert at 92NY on May 17th for a live conversation about how mindfulness can deepen connection and combat loneliness, available in person and via streaming. Register here.

Join Dan, Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18, 2026. Register here.

PLUS: Stay tuned for more of all things sleep from May 10 - 15 when we kick off Sleep Week across the 10% Happier cinematic universe. On the podcast… In the 10% with Dan Harris app… More soon!

For more than a decade, I struggled mightily with my sleep. Part of the problem was circumstantial. I worked in television news, which required me to get up at four in the morning on some days and work until midnight on others. Then, after I left the news business, I got into a contentious, three-year divorce from my co-founders at my old meditation app, which caused untold stress and insomnia. But even after I resolved all of that, I still couldn’t sleep.

Sign up for the 10% with Dan Harris app

During my nights of tossing and turning, I was haunted by memories of all the podcast episodes I’d done with sleep experts, who talked about the brain damage that occurs when we don’t sleep. All day, our brain cells are busy spewing out metabolic waste. Sleep is the “garbage truck” that handles the cleanup, but it needs time to work. If you only get four hours of sleep, that cleanup process doesn’t work as efficiently, and some of that garbage can linger. During my sleepless nights, I was also haunted by the case study of my father, a pioneering oncologist and avid runner who developed dementia in his seventies, possibly caused (or exacerbated) by untreated sleep apnea.

The good news: about six months ago, I was finally diagnosed with something called “restless leg syndrome,” an absurd name for a truly life-destroying condition. I finally got the right treatment and now, most nights, I sleep exceedingly well.

Why am I burdening you with all of this backstory? Because, throughout this excruciating odyssey, I learned a ton about sleep hygiene. So, below, you will find my science-backed sleep routine. Please view this as a menu, not a to-do list. Take what looks good for you and leave the rest.

• Consistent wakeup time. Turns out, sleep hygiene actually begins in the morning. Getting up at the same time anchors your circadian rhythm, the body’s internal clock that regulates sleep. A landmark 2023 study of over 60,000 people found that sleep consistency is actually a better predictor of health and longevity than the total number of hours you sleep. (Full disclosure: Of all the strategies I’m listing here, this is the one where I show the least discipline.)

• Morning sunlight. After I get up, I try to expose my eyes to daylight, either by stepping outside or using a sun lamp. Morning light signals to your brain that the day has officially begun, which effectively sets a biological timer for your body to start producing melatonin again roughly 14 to 16 hours later.

• Morning exercise. Getting your body moving increases what researchers call “sleep pressure,” so that you are good and tired at bedtime. You can also exercise in the afternoon, of course, but for some people, intense late-day exercise can backfire.

• No naps or coffee after 2 p.m. There are huge individual differences here. Some people can take an afternoon siesta or chug a latte after dinner and they are totally fine. Not me, though.

• No alcohol with dinner. I don’t drink anyway (my body can’t tolerate it), so this isn’t hard for me. But for many of you, it’s a bummer; I get it. The science is clear, though. Alcohol can be a sedative initially, but it disrupts and degrades your sleep later in the night.

• Minimal liquids in the evening. The more you drink, the more you’ll have to get up to pee.

• Screen hygiene. I try to put my phone away by 8 p.m. Notifications don’t just distract you; they keep your brain in a state of high alert. Creating a deliberate buffer between your devices and your pillow is essential for allowing the brain to settle.

• Keep the room dark and cool. This reduces sensory stimulation and supports your body’s natural drop in core temperature.

• Create a wind-down routine. Mine includes two key steps:

  • 15 minutes of walking meditation. Helps me settle the mind and get the ants out of my proverbial pants. Some people also like to lay in bed and do a body scan meditation, which can significantly improve sleep quality.

  • Take a warm shower. But, wait, didn’t I just say that it helps to be chilly? Turns out, when you take a warm shower or bath, it temporarily raises skin temperature, which then speeds heat loss when you get out.

    • Bonus: while I’m in the shower, I run through a list of all the good things that happened during the day. Research shows that gratitude reduces pre-sleep anxiety, making it much easier for the brain to stop ruminating and start shutting down.

• Light reading. Keep it analog, no screens. Also, keep the light low.

• If you’re struggling to sleep, get out of bed. You don’t want to teach your brain that the bed is a place for struggle. If you’ve been tossing and turning for what feels like 20 minutes, get up, do something that’s not too stimulating (like reading), and try again when you feel tired.

• Use self-compassion. If you’re not sleeping, your mind can easily devolve into a snarl of self-blame and fretful projection. I can’t believe this is happening, tomorrow is going to suck, etc. In these moments, I try to talk to myself the way I would talk to my son. Dude, you’ve been here a million times. Even if you get no sleep, you’ll be fine. It’ll be annoying, but manageable. Don’t sweat it. Super helpful. Often lulls me back to sleep.

Share

For more on how to get good sleep and other neuroscience-backed strategies for a stronger brain, listen to my 10% Happier episode with neuroscientists Wendy Suzuki and Amishi Jha.

Also out is my episode with psychologists Zindel Segal and Norman Farb on how to use your senses to reduce overthinking and turn down the voice in your head.

Over on the 10% with Dan Harris app:

Join Teacher of the Month Susa Talan tomorrow (Tuesday, April 21 at 4 p.m. ET) for a live meditation and Q&A on Zoom. Drop your questions for her in the event post on the app here.

Upcoming events in person:

On May 17, join me for a conversation with Allison Gilbert at 92NY in NYC about how self-awareness and self-compassion can transform not only our inner lives but our relationships. Get tickets here.

Tickets for the next Meditation Party are available here! Jeff Warren, Sebene Selassie, and I are doing another version of our annual retreat this Oct. 16-18. It’s at the Omega Institute in upstate NY. Think four big sessions of meditation, conversation, and Q&A—with plenty of free time to hike the 240-acre campus, play some pickleball, shoot hoops, or just relax by the lake. You can also drop into yoga or tai chi classes, and on Saturday night there’s even a dance party (totally optional, I promise).

Sign up for the 10% with Dan Harris app

Paid subscribers to the new 10% with Dan Harris app get:

• Guided Meditations: A library of guided sessions to help with stress, anxiety, focus, sleep, annoying people, and more.

• Meditation Challenges: Structured programs to deepen your practice with clear goals, daily guidance, and community support.

• Live Meditation and Q&A Sessions: Every week, meditate live with me and some of the best meditation teachers on earth. Ask questions. Get actual answers.

• The 10% Happier Podcast: Subscribers get access to ad-free versions of my pod. Both the new episodes and the entire archive, stretching back almost 10 years.

• Community Connection: Join conversations with thousands of other practitioners who get it. Share your struggles, celebrate wins, get support when you need it.

Join the party.

Subscribe to our Substack

For more than a decade, I struggled mightily with my sleep. Part of the problem was circumstantial. I worked in television news, which required me to get up at four in the morning on some days and work until midnight on others. Then, after I left the news business, I got into a contentious, three-year divorce from my co-founders at my old meditation app, which caused untold stress and insomnia. But even after I resolved all of that, I still couldn’t sleep.

Sign up for the 10% with Dan Harris app

During my nights of tossing and turning, I was haunted by memories of all the podcast episodes I’d done with sleep experts, who talked about the brain damage that occurs when we don’t sleep. All day, our brain cells are busy spewing out metabolic waste. Sleep is the “garbage truck” that handles the cleanup, but it needs time to work. If you only get four hours of sleep, that cleanup process doesn’t work as efficiently, and some of that garbage can linger. During my sleepless nights, I was also haunted by the case study of my father, a pioneering oncologist and avid runner who developed dementia in his seventies, possibly caused (or exacerbated) by untreated sleep apnea.

The good news: about six months ago, I was finally diagnosed with something called “restless leg syndrome,” an absurd name for a truly life-destroying condition. I finally got the right treatment and now, most nights, I sleep exceedingly well.

Why am I burdening you with all of this backstory? Because, throughout this excruciating odyssey, I learned a ton about sleep hygiene. So, below, you will find my science-backed sleep routine. Please view this as a menu, not a to-do list. Take what looks good for you and leave the rest.

• Consistent wakeup time. Turns out, sleep hygiene actually begins in the morning. Getting up at the same time anchors your circadian rhythm, the body’s internal clock that regulates sleep. (Full disclosure: Of all the strategies I’m listing here, this is the one where I show the least discipline.)

• Morning sunlight. After I get up, I try to expose my eyes to daylight, either by stepping outside or using a sun lamp. Bright light signals to your brain that the day has officially begun, which effectively sets a biological timer for your body to start producing melatonin again roughly 14 to 16 hours later.

• Morning exercise. Getting your body moving increases what researchers call “sleep pressure,” so that you are good and tired at bedtime. You can also exercise in the afternoon, of course, but for some people, intense late-day exercise can backfire.

• No naps or coffee after 2 p.m. There are huge individual differences here. Some people can take an afternoon siesta or chug a latte after dinner and they are totally fine. Not me, though.

• No alcohol with dinner. I don’t drink anyway (my body can’t tolerate it), so this isn’t hard for me. But for many of you, it’s a bummer; I get it. The science is clear, though. Alcohol can be a sedative initially, but it disrupts and degrades your sleep later in the night.

• Minimal liquids in the evening. The more you drink, the more you’ll have to get up to pee.

• Screen hygiene. I try to put my phone away by 8 p.m. Notifications don’t just distract you; they keep your brain in a state of high alert. Creating a deliberate buffer between your devices and your pillow is essential for allowing the brain to settle.

• Keep the room dark and cool. This reduces sensory stimulation and supports your body’s natural drop in core temperature.

• Create a wind-down routine. Mine includes two key steps:

  • 15 minutes of walking meditation. Helps me settle the mind and get the ants out of my proverbial pants. Some people also like to lay in bed and do a body scan meditation, which can significantly improve sleep quality.

  • Take a warm shower. But, wait, didn’t I just say that it helps to be chilly? Turns out, when you take a warm shower or bath, it temporarily raises skin temperature, which then speeds heat loss when you get out.

    • Bonus: while I’m in the shower, I run through a list of all the good things that happened during the day. Research shows that gratitude reduces pre-sleep anxiety, making it much easier for the brain to stop ruminating and start shutting down.

• Light reading. Keep it analog, no screens. Also, keep the light low.

• If you’re struggling to sleep, get out of bed. You don’t want to teach your brain that the bed is a place for struggle. If you’ve been tossing and turning for what feels like 20 minutes, get up, do something that’s not too stimulating (like reading), and try again when you feel tired.

• Use self-compassion. If you’re not sleeping, your mind can easily devolve into a snarl of self-blame and fretful projection. I can’t believe this is happening, tomorrow is going to suck, etc. In these moments, I try to talk to myself the way I would talk to my son. Dude, you’ve been here a million times. Even if you get no sleep, you’ll be fine. It’ll be annoying, but manageable. Don’t sweat it. Super helpful. Often lulls me back to sleep.

Share

For more on how to get good sleep and other neuroscience-backed strategies for a stronger brain, listen to my 10% Happier episode with neuroscientists Wendy Suzuki and Amishi Jha.

Also out is my episode with psychologists Zindel Segal and Norman Farb on how to use your senses to reduce overthinking and turn down the voice in your head.

Over on the 10% with Dan Harris app:

Join Teacher of the Month Susa Talan tomorrow (Tuesday, April 21 at 4 p.m. ET) for a live meditation and Q&A on Zoom. Drop your questions for her in the event post on the app here.

Upcoming events in person:

On May 17, join me for a conversation with Allison Gilbert at 92NY in NYC about how self-awareness and self-compassion can transform not only our inner lives but our relationships. Get tickets here.

Tickets for the next Meditation Party are available here! Jeff Warren, Sebene Selassie, and I are doing another version of our annual retreat this Oct. 16-18. It’s at the Omega Institute in upstate NY. Think four big sessions of meditation, conversation, and Q&A—with plenty of free time to hike the 240-acre campus, play some pickleball, shoot hoops, or just relax by the lake. You can also drop into yoga or tai chi classes, and on Saturday night there’s even a dance party (totally optional, I promise).

Sign up for the 10% with Dan Harris app

Paid subscribers to the new 10% with Dan Harris app get:

• Guided Meditations: A library of guided sessions to help with stress, anxiety, focus, sleep, annoying people, and more.

• Meditation Challenges: Structured programs to deepen your practice with clear goals, daily guidance, and community support.

• Live Meditation and Q&A Sessions: Every week, meditate live with me and some of the best meditation teachers on earth. Ask questions. Get actual answers.

• The 10% Happier Podcast: Subscribers get access to ad-free versions of my pod. Both the new episodes and the entire archive, stretching back almost 10 years.

• Community Connection: Join conversations with thousands of other practitioners who get it. Share your struggles, celebrate wins, get support when you need it.

Join the party.

Subscribe to our Substack

In this episode we talk about:

• How the brain’s default mode network is essential to our survival but also can keep us stuck in rumination and overthinking

• Segal and Farb’s simple practice of “sense foraging” and why they say it can help break patterns and thoughts that aren’t serving us

• The differences and the similarities between sense foraging and mindfulness

Related Episodes:

• Depression and Anxiety: Your Old Enemies, Your Best Friends | Zindel Segal

• Gretchen Rubin on: How To Use Your Five Senses To Reduce Anxiety, Increase Creativity, and Improve Your Relationships

• Why You Can’t Pay Attention - And How to Think Deeply Again | Johann Hari

In this episode we talk about:

• Cognitive reframing tools to shift your mindset

• Maria’s daily Stoic routine

• What Stoicism actually is (including its limits)

• What to do when mediating gives you anxiety

• The danger of “baited bounties”

• How to “get shit done” with non-attachment

• Using fantasy as a coping mechanism

• And more

Related Episodes:

• Stoic Practices for Getting Rid of Mental Junk, Your Morning Routine, and Talking to the Dead | Ryan Holiday

• Stoic Advice for Handling Setbacks, Insults, and Death | William Irvine

Additional Resources:

• William Irvine’s “A Guide to the Good Life”

Join Dan and Emmy Award-winning journalist Allison Gilbert at 92NY on May 17th for a live conversation about how mindfulness can deepen connection and combat loneliness, available in person and via streaming. Register here.

Join Dan, Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18, 2026. Register here.

Wendy Suzuki, PhD is the Dean of New York University College of Arts & Science and a Professor of Neural Science and Psychology at New York University. She is the author of the books Healthy Brain, Happy Life and Good Anxiety.

To celebrate the show’s 10th anniversary, we’re producing episodes that share top 10 lists of practices, strategies and more from our favorite experts. A heartfelt thank you to everyone who has listened and supported the show over the years. None of this would be possible without you.

Join Dan and Emmy Award-winning journalist Allison Gilbert at 92NY on May 17th for a live conversation about how mindfulness can deepen connection and combat loneliness, available in person and via streaming. Register here.

Join Dan, Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18, 2026. Register here.

Each week in the app we’ll post a new mini-experiment to try at home. There’s no doing it right and no way to fail. The point is just to give it a shot and (if you’re up for it) share your experience with the community. Scroll down for a sneak preview of our first Practice Lab mini-experiment.

The Goal: Small tests. Lasting breakthroughs. No pressure.

If you’re not a paid subscriber to the app, now is the time to sign up. Get a 14-day free trial.

We all feel it. Our nervous systems are under assault, both externally and internally. From the blistering, Trump-era news cycle, from all the uncertainty around AI, from the distraction, despair, and FOMO produced by invasive, addictive technology. Add that to our innate tendencies toward rushing and over-committing. I shudder to think how often I still find myself living in my head, plotting and planning, trundling mindlessly through this evanescent life. My teacher Joseph Goldstein calls this the “toppling forward” state.

Which is why I’m always on the lookout for smart strategies to help reset my nervous system. To, and I know this is a little cliché, but… get out of my head and into my body. The author and therapist Prentis Hemphill is a human goldmine in this regard. At a time when the world is demanding we move at a pace completely disconnected from our physical reality, here are three simple countermeasures:

• Sing and dance to reset your system. Most of us, especially the desk-bound, spend too much time being still, but Prentis notes our bodies are designed for motion. Forced stillness is often how we physically bottle up our feelings; when we’re stressed, we instinctively tighten our jaws and throats to hold everything in. To break that cycle, try singing (even if you’re a terrible singer) to let the vibration of your voice settle your nerves. Just a few minutes of dancing can also help. (Nobody has to see you do this.)

• Identify your “Lighthouse Commitment.” Think of this as a steady point of orientation to return to when the world inevitably knocks you off center. Unlike a standard achievement-based goal, this is about articulating what you really care about, and letting that guide how you organize your entire life. Prentis recommends naming a specific commitment every year. Mine, as many of you know, is captured by the tattoo on my left wrist: FTBOAB, for the benefit of all beings. The classic Buddhist rallying cry jolts me out of distraction and self-concern.

• Practice “micro-interdependence.” Prentis argues that isolation is actually an illusion; the fundamental reality of life is relationship, meaning we are always in a physical exchange with the world around us, whether we’re breathing in oxygen from trees or reacting to the people in our neighborhood. To counter the habit of shutting down and armoring up, Prentis recommends taking “little risks.” This could be as simple as making brief eye contact with someone you’d normally look past. We think turtling up will make us safer, but connection, even if it’s fleeting, even if it’s awkward, settles the system. We’re wired for it. Go for that contact high.

For more strategies for getting out of your head and thriving in a chaotic world, listen to my episode with Prentis Hemphill.

Share this email

Also out is my episode with cognitive scientist Maryellen MacDonald on how the way you talk to other people (and yourself) can reduce dysregulation and distraction, and lead to better decisions.

Over on the 10% with Dan Harris app:

Join me tomorrow (Tuesday, April 14 at 4 p.m. ET) for a live meditation and Q&A on Zoom. Drop your questions for me in the event post on the app here.

And, as we mentioned up top, today is the launch of the Practice Lab in the 10% with Dan Harris app. Here’s the first prompt, so you get a taste.

Upcoming events in person:

On May 17, join me for a conversation with Allison Gilbert at 92NY in NYC about how self-awareness and self-compassion can transform not only our inner lives but our relationships. Get tickets here.

Tickets for the next Meditation Party are available here! Jeff Warren, Sebene Selassie, and I are doing another version of our annual retreat this Oct. 16-18. It’s at the Omega Institute in upstate NY. Think four big sessions of meditation, conversation, and Q&A—with plenty of free time to hike the 240-acre campus, play some pickleball, shoot hoops, or just relax by the lake. You can also drop into yoga or tai chi classes, and on Saturday night there’s even a dance party (totally optional, I promise).

Sign up for the 10% with Dan Harris app

Paid subscribers to the new 10% with Dan Harris app get:

• Guided Meditations: A library of guided sessions to help with stress, anxiety, focus, sleep, annoying people, and more.

• Meditation Challenges: Structured programs to deepen your practice with clear goals, daily guidance, and community support.

• Live Meditation and Q&A Sessions: Every week, meditate live with me and some of the best meditation teachers on earth. Ask questions. Get actual answers.

• The 10% Happier Podcast: Subscribers get access to ad-free versions of my pod. Both the new episodes and the entire archive, stretching back almost 10 years.

• Community Connection: Join conversations with thousands of other practitioners who get it. Share your struggles, celebrate wins, get support when you need it.

Join the party.

Share Dan Harris

Related Episodes:

• The Science Of Journaling: How Writing Reduces Overthinking, Rumination, And Anxiety | Dr. James Pennebaker (Co-Interviewed By Dr. Bianca Harris)

Join Dan and Emmy Award-winning journalist Allison Gilbert at 92NY on May 17th for a live conversation about how mindfulness can deepen connection and combat loneliness, available in person and via streaming. Register here.

Join Dan, Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18, 2026. Register here.

• “Trust Life” vs. “This Is the Curriculum” — Sebene shares the origin of her tattoo and what the mantra has meant through years of health challenges. Jeff offers his own version — and why fighting your circumstances is, as Sebene puts it, “bananas.”

• The three timescales of practice — Jeff breaks down how meditation works in the moment, over months and years, and across the arc of a whole life. The third one is where things get interesting.

• Obsessive thinking / rumination — Practical tools from all three, including one from Sebene involving a trampoline, and one from a clinical psychologist that will make you feel ridiculous in the best way.

• Listener Q&A — Work-life balance, intention-setting, and the eternal napping-vs.-meditating debate.

• Recommendations — A fantasy novel, a clowning workshop, a 48-hour celebrity memoir, and a Netflix documentary that may make you want Lionel Richie to run for president.

Sebene Selassie describes herself as a “writer, teacher, and immigrant-weirdo.” She teaches meditation on the ten percent happier app and is the author of a great book called You Belong. She’s based in Brooklyn.

Jeff Warren is also a writer and a meditation teacher. He and Dan co-wrote the book, Meditation for Fidgety Skeptics. He also hosts the Consciousness Explorers podcast. He’s based in Toronto.

Related episodes:

How to Stay Calm No Matter What’s Happening | Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren

Meditation Party: The “Sh*t Is Fertilizer” Edition | Sebene Selassie & Jeff Warren

Meditation Party with Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren: Psychedelics, ADHD, Waking Up From Distraction, and Singing Without Being Self-Conscious

Meditation Party: Magic, Mystery, Intuition, Tattoos, and Non-Efforting | Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren

Science-Based Tools for When You’re Stressed, Obsessed, or Overthinking | Dr. Jenny Taitz

Join Dan and Emmy Award-winning journalist Allison Gilbert at 92NY on May 17th for a live conversation about how mindfulness can deepen connection and combat loneliness, available in person and via streaming. Register here.

Join Dan, Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18, 2026. Register here.

As Arthur Brooks argues, this reflex is part of a much bigger problem: a modern “doom loop.” We use our phones the way people use alcohol—not for pleasure, but for relief. Relief from boredom, anxiety, and the low-grade discomfort of being alone with our own minds.

But here’s the trap: The more we distract ourselves from those feelings, the emptier we feel. The big questions of our lives exist within those uncomfortable moments. And if you never let those questions arise, you slowly starve your life of meaning.

To reclaim meaning, Arthur offers a simple two-question exam:

• Why am I alive?

• What would I be willing to die for?

To answer these questions, you need something modern life is very good at destroying: space. So how do you get it back? Arthur has two suggestions:

1. Act like a rebel. Think of modern technology as a system designed to hijack your attention for profit. Which means reclaiming your attention isn’t self-help, it’s defiance.

2. Impose constraints on your tech use. You probably won’t quit your phone, but you can create structure:

• No devices for the first and last hour of the day

• No phones during meals

• Designate tech-free spaces (bedroom, etc.)

• Once a year, try a multi-day break (retreat, nature, silence)

Since interviewing Arthur recently, I have gotten much more disciplined about implementing tech-free spaces at the beginning and end of each day, and I have found it to be incredibly helpful.

I’ll leave you with a quick little anecdote. I remember vividly, back around 2007, shortly after I got my first iPhone, I was standing in an airport, waiting for a flight, doing an early version of doom-scrolling. I recall thinking, “I’ll never be bored again.” But it turns out that the cultural achievement of “solving” boredom came at a high cost to the species.

Reacquainting yourself with boredom ain’t easy, but it’s worth it. When you remove constant stimulation, something interesting happens in the brain; your default mode network kicks on. That’s when reflection, integration, and meaning-making occur. In other words: the mind only starts to make sense of your life when you stop interrupting it.

For more on why the modern world makes meaning so hard to find and practical tips to rediscover a deeper purpose, listen to my episode with Arthur Brooks. Arthur’s latest book, The Meaning of Your Life, just hit the shelves. Get your copy now.

Also out is my episode with renowned addiction expert Gabor Maté, who shares five steps to stop scrolling, bingeing, and self-medicating—and reclaim your brain.

Over on the 10% with Dan Harris app:

Join me and Teacher of the Month Susa Talan for a live meditation and Q&A tomorrow (Tuesday, April 7 at 4 p.m. ET) on Zoom. Drop your questions for us in the event post on the app here.

Upcoming events in person:

On May 17, join me for a conversation with Allison Gilbert at 92NY in NYC about how self-awareness and self-compassion can transform not only our inner lives but our relationships. Get tickets here.

Tickets for the next Meditation Party are available here! Jeff Warren, Sebene Selassie, and I are doing another version of our annual retreat this Oct. 16-18. It’s at the Omega Institute in upstate NY. Think four big sessions of meditation, conversation, and Q&A—with plenty of free time to hike the 240-acre campus, play some pickleball, shoot hoops, or just relax by the lake. You can also drop into yoga or tai chi classes, and on Saturday night there’s even a dance party (totally optional, I promise).

Sign up for the 10% with Dan Harris app

Paid subscribers to the new 10% with Dan Harris app get:

• Guided Meditations: A library of guided sessions to help with stress, anxiety, focus, sleep, annoying people, and more.

• Meditation Challenges: Structured programs to deepen your practice with clear goals, daily guidance, and community support.

• Live Meditation and Q&A Sessions: Every week, meditate live with me and some of the best meditation teachers on earth. Ask questions. Get actual answers.

• The 10% Happier Podcast: Subscribers get access to ad-free versions of my pod. Both the new episodes and the entire archive, stretching back almost 10 years.

• Community Connection: Join conversations with thousands of other practitioners who get it. Share your struggles, celebrate wins, get support when you need it.

Join the party.

Share

Related Episodes:

• Modern Life Is Making You Sick, but It Doesn’t Have To

Additional Resources:

• Rethinking ADHD

• The Myth of Normal

• Scattered Minds

Join Dan and Emmy Award-winning journalist Allison Gilbert at 92NY on May 17th for a live conversation about how mindfulness can deepen connection and combat loneliness, available in person and via streaming. Register here.

Join Dan, Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18, 2026.Register here.

Bart is the guiding teacher at Community Meditation Center in New York, where he leads weekly sessions grounded in Buddhist tradition. In this episode, he takes on four of the most common sticking points in practice: forgiveness, boredom, disconnection from the body, and the spiral of anxious “what if” thinking.

His approach throughout is warm, precise, and grounded — less about achieving a particular state and more about learning to hold whatever arises with curiosity and kindness.

Topics covered:

• Forgiveness — why forcing it can backfire, what it means to “bypass” difficult emotions, and the reframe that changes everything: forgiveness as giving up all hope for a better past

• Boredom — how to get genuinely curious about it instead of fighting it, and what it can teach you about why you reach for your phone

• Getting into your body — why embodiment looks different for everyone, and how to find the activities (yes, even mindful salsa dancing or vacuuming) that make it easier

• Worry and “what if” thoughts — the Buddhist framing of worry as an obstacle to clear seeing, and a simple breathwork technique from Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche — exhale heavy, exhale calm — that works even in the hardest moments

• Community as practice — the Buddha’s teaching that friendship and community isn’t half the path. It’s the whole thing.

About Bart van Melik: Bart van Melik is a meditation teacher and guiding teacher at Community Meditation Center, a global and local community that meets weekly via Zoom. Monthly sessions are donation-based and open to all. Learn more at https://www.cmc-ny.org/.

Additional Resources:

• Office Hours with Arthur Brooks

Join Dan and Emmy Award-winning journalist Allison Gilbert at 92NY on May 17th for a live conversation about how mindfulness can deepen connection and combat loneliness, available in person and via streaming. Register here.

Join Dan, Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18, 2026.Register here.

The good news is: your purpose doesn’t have to be gauzy or grandiose. It also doesn’t have to be the product of a shitload of suffering that earns you hard-won wisdom. It can be very down to earth and practical, and it can change over time. Moreover, purpose is a skill you can develop. And the rewards are immense.

Before I get to the how-to of it, two compelling scientific findings. First, among adults 65 and older, a strong sense of purpose is the single most important psychological predictor of longevity, after controlling for other factors. Second, and maybe more immediately useful, purpose is one of the biggest contributors to resilience, the speed with which you recover from adversity. The stronger your sense of purpose, the faster you bounce back.

Below are three ways to operationalize purpose in your life right now. These come from a pair of scientists named Richie Davidson and Cortland Dahl, who were recently on my podcast.

• Reframe the mundane. Before a daily chore — dishes, garbage, laundry — consciously connect it to an altruistic motive. Richie actually does this every night before scooping his cat’s litter box: he reflects on how that action benefits his wife and anyone who walks into the living room, not to mention the cat. The task is identical, but the inner experience is completely different.

• The One-Minute Motivation Reset. Before you start a new project, begin a difficult conversation, or embark on anything potentially meaningful, pause for sixty seconds to reset your motivation. Mentally state a brief aspiration, something like “may whatever comes of this do some good in the world” or “may this reach somebody who really needs it.” The point is that purpose isn’t just a warm, fuzzy thought — it’s about linking something you’re actually doing at that moment to a value that’s important to you.

• Use adversity as a cue. Often, when we feel anxious or frustrated, we get hijacked and lose our sense of direction. Richie suggests a mental shift: the uncomfortable feeling itself can be the reminder to check back in. Instead of a challenge being an interruption of your purpose, the stress becomes the signal to reconnect with what’s important. Over time difficult moments stop derailing you and start acting as triggers keeping you connected to your purpose and values.

For more on how to train your sense of purpose and the science of flourishing, listen to the full episode with Richie Davidson and Cortland Dahl.

Also out this week is my episode with bestselling author John Green who shares his toolkit for a noisy mind.

Over on the 10% with Dan Harris app:

Join me for a live meditation and Q&A tomorrow (Tuesday, March 31 at 4 p.m. ET) on Zoom. Drop your questions for me in the event post on the app here.

Upcoming events in person:

On May 17, join me for a conversation with Allison Gilbert at 92NY in NYC about how self-awareness and self-compassion can transform not only our inner lives but our relationships. Get tickets here.

Tickets for the next Meditation Party are available here! Jeff Warren, Sebene Selassie, and I are doing another version of our annual retreat this Oct. 16-18. It’s at the Omega Institute in upstate NY. Think four big sessions of meditation, conversation, and Q&A—with plenty of free time to hike the 240-acre campus, play some pickleball, shoot hoops, or just relax by the lake. You can also drop into yoga or tai chi classes, and on Saturday night there’s even a dance party (totally optional, I promise).

Sign up for the 10% with Dan Harris app

Paid subscribers to the new 10% with Dan Harris app get:

• Guided Meditations: A library of guided sessions to help with stress, anxiety, focus, sleep, annoying people, and more.

• Meditation Challenges: Structured programs to deepen your practice with clear goals, daily guidance, and community support.

• Live Meditation and Q&A Sessions: Every week, meditate live with me and some of the best meditation teachers on earth. Ask questions. Get actual answers.

• The 10% Happier Podcast: Subscribers get access to ad-free versions of my pod. Both the new episodes and the entire archive, stretching back almost 10 years.

• Community Connection: Join conversations with thousands of other practitioners who get it. Share your struggles, celebrate wins, get support when you need it.

Join the party.

Share

Cortland Dahl, PhD, is a scientist, author, translator, and meditation teacher for the Tergar community.

Davidson and Dahl’s latest book is Born to Flourish. They also author the Substack newsletter, Dharma Lab.

Join Dan and Emmy Award-winning journalist Allison Gilbert at 92NY on May 17th for a live conversation about how mindfulness can deepen connection and combat loneliness, available in person and via streaming. Register here.

Join Dan, Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18, 2026. Register here.

Dan recently sat down with journalist and broadcaster Sam Sanders on the Sam Sanders Show to explore exactly that idea. Sam has a concept he calls “modern scriptures”: the movies, albums, and TV shows you return to again and again because they ground you, center you, and remind you what matters. Dan shares the pop culture that never fails to lift his spirits — and along the way, the two get into why beauty and art are actually central to human flourishing, why Ferris Bueller is more Buddhist than you might think, and what the research says about making resolutions stick — including the one upstream habit that makes everything else easier.

The Sam Sanders Show is a co-production of KCRW and Sam Sanders Productions. Sign up for Sam’s newsletter for behind-the-scenes extras from every episode.