Do this the next time you have an urge to mindlessly scroll, shop, eat, etc.
How to S.T.O.P.
We’ve all had that “zombie arm” moment where your hand reaches for your phone or a bag of chips without a conscious command from your brain. Before you know it, you’re three posts deep into a stranger’s social media feed or clicking “add to cart” on something you don’t actually need.
According to researcher and addiction expert Eric Garland, this isn’t a personal failing—it’s a product of how our brains evolved. Our ancient ancestors had to be incredibly efficient at detecting threats and seeking rewards like high-calorie food to survive. When a behavior was rewarded, the brain learned to reinforce it so we could repeat it without burning precious mental energy.
But in a world of endless scrolling and one-click shopping, that same efficiency becomes a trap. With enough repetition, the behavior becomes “automatized”. It starts happening entirely outside of conscious intention or even awareness. Before you know it, you are on full autopilot.
The good news? You can de-automatize these habits by making the unconscious conscious.
Eric developed a protocol called MORE (Mindfulness-Oriented Recovery Enhancement) to help people with everything from chronic pain to severe addiction, but its core tools work just as well for our everyday compulsions.
One of the practical tools Eric recommends is a practice called S.T.O.P. Try it the next time you feel that itch to scroll, shop, or eat mindlessly:
S: Stop. The moment you feel the compulsion to scroll, shop, or eat, literally pause before you engage in the habit.
T: Take a mindful breath. Spend 30 to 60 seconds focusing on the sensation of air moving in and out of your body. This isn’t just relaxing—it’s a physiological reset that creates a gap between the urge and the action.
O: Observe. Look at the craving as if you’re a scientist. Notice the tightness in your chest or the restless energy in your fingers. Realize that the craving is just a temporary physical event in the body. It isn’t a command you have to obey.
P: Proceed with intention. Now that you’re no longer on autopilot, you can choose what to do next. If you still choose to engage in the behavior, do it mindfully and give it your full attention, rather than doing it like a zombie.
What many people discover is that by simply interrupting the loop with these four steps, the desire often weakens and loses its power over time.
For more on the neuroscience of reducing chronic pain and everyday addictions, listen to the full interview with Eric Garland.
Also out this week is a new episode from my hilarious conversation with the comedian Pete Holmes recorded in NYC as part of a benefit for the amazing organization New York Insight Meditation Center.
Over on the 10% with Dan Harris app:
Tomorrow (Tuesday, March 10 at 4 p.m. ET) Teacher of the Month Sebene Selassie is going live for a guided meditation and Q&A on Zoom. Drop your questions for her in the event post on the app here.
And later this month, join the Even You Can Meditate Challenge! From March 23–27, we’ll be dropping a new meditation from Sebene each day. The Challenge is a kind of sampler, showcasing five different types of meditation. It’s designed to introduce beginners to a variety of styles, as well as inspire regular meditators who may want to shake things up.
Upcoming events in person:
I’ll be speaking at the Jung Center in Houston on March 24 for their annual Spring Benefit. Tickets are available here.
On May 17, join me for a conversation with Allison Gilbert at 92NY in NYC about how self-awareness and self-compassion can transform not only our inner lives but our relationships. Get tickets here.
Tickets for the next Meditation Party are available here! Jeff Warren, Sebene Selassie, and I are doing another version of our annual retreat this Oct. 16-18. It’s at the Omega Institute in upstate NY. Think four big sessions of meditation, conversation, and Q&A—with plenty of free time to hike the 240-acre campus, play some pickleball, shoot hoops, or just relax by the lake. You can also drop into yoga or tai chi classes, and on Saturday night there’s even a dance party (totally optional, I promise).
Paid subscribers to the new 10% with Dan Harris app get:
Guided Meditations: A library of guided sessions to help with stress, anxiety, focus, sleep, annoying people, and more.
Meditation Challenges: Structured programs to deepen your practice with clear goals, daily guidance, and community support.
Live Meditation and Q&A Sessions: Every week, meditate live with me and some of the best meditation teachers on earth. Ask questions. Get actual answers.
The 10% Happier Podcast: Subscribers get access to ad-free versions of my pod. Both the new episodes and the entire archive, stretching back almost 10 years.
Community Connection: Join conversations with thousands of other practitioners who get it. Share your struggles, celebrate wins, get support when you need it.
Join the party.
So simple but yet so difficult.
For me the realisation that my phone use was entirely automatic was properly life-changing. Everything I've done since has flowed from it - if it's automatic, what can you do in the moment? The only logical response is getting ahead of it with mental training. I really look forward to listening. And to reading this book.