Next time you’re angry, try this

A powerful hack for a destructive psychological force

I’ve made no secret about the fact that anger is one of my most problematic and counterproductive demons. So my ears perked up when I heard the following advice from the legendary Buddhist teacher, Tara Brach, who is on my podcast today.

Next time you’re angry, ask yourself: what’s beneath it? Anger is sometimes considered a secondary emotion. That is, it’s often covering up for something deeper. For me, what’s beneath my rage is usually anxiety. It can also be sadness or care/concern.

If you can use your mindfulness to tap into what’s beneath the anger, you might be less caught up in said anger—and therefore better able to handle whatever the situation might be.

I’m not here to say this is easy. For me, it can be deeply uncomfortable to sit with the fear/anxiety that can lurks beneath my anger like a leviathan. But better the discomfort than mindlessly acting out my rage in all sorts of dumb ways.

I’ve started a new chat thread to go deeper into all of this - hope to see you in there.

Listen to—or watch—the episode below (you can also listen wherever you get your podcasts):

And last but definitely not least—check out this special guided meditation that Tara made just for us, with these tumultuous times in mind.

Below, paid subscribers get a cheatsheet of the episode with a list of key takeaways, time-coded highlights, and a full transcript. If you sign up, you’ll also get access to the chat, ability to comment on this and other posts, monthly live-streamed AMAs, and more.